Forty Days Later

Did you miss me? Probably not. 

In all likelihood you didn’t even notice my absence. But over the course of the last 40 days (46 including Sundays) I managed to *almost completely cut social media out of my life. That means no posting on Facebook or reading posts, no tweets, tweeting, re-tweeting or engaging in any sort of Twitter action, no Google+ (simply making me like every other person on the internet it seems in that regard) and no blogging. This was my lenten discipline this year and now that it’s finally over I can take some time to reflect upon what I learned. And what better way to reflect upon the ending of a social media fast than by blogging all about it! So here in no particular order are the things I learned about myself, my friends, my culture and the world through 40 days without social media.

• I am a narcissist. I really think that what I have to say is important and interesting to people when in reality 95+% of it is not. (And I realize the irony of posting this thought in a blog that I'm then going to share on FB and Twitter)

• I am an information junkie. I literally went through withdrawal from not knowing what was going on at all times. It was way harder than it should be. This has taught me some things about my concept of boundaries and the personal life/ ministry life divide. 

• The Facebook app is killing my phone. I know that there have been a number of news articles in the last while highlighting this fact, but I have seen the real world difference that it makes. The difference is astounding. 

• We have become very very lazy as a culture. We don't make the effort to keep people abreast of what is going on in our lives anymore, we just publish it on social media and expect that everyone else will follow our circumstances. Intentional relationship building is becoming a lost art. 

• Without social media I am more productive. This may be one of those "duh" statements but it really is true. I spend a lot of time keeping up with social media and removing from my life made me more productive. 

• I have been more present with people without the constant drone of social media updates sounding on my devices. I only got interrupted with actuall text messages and phone calls. It allowed me to be more focused on the people in front of me. Because let's be honest, even if you are disciplined enough not to check what that noise or vibration was (and I am) you become mentally distracted thinking about what it could be. 

• My kids have interesting things to say. Who knew?

• A mobile phone becomes more of a tool and less of a toy without social media apps installed.

• I missed a lot of birthdays, including my own. Thanks to everyone who sent me kind Facebook greetings anyway.

• I didn’t miss a lot of people in my circles/friends list as much as I thought I might.

• I managed to escape the taunts and barbs of people eager to mock me with the epic collapse of my Toronto Maple Leafs in the run up to the NHL playoffs.

So what do I do with what I learned? Well like it or not, social media has become and indispensable tool for ministry in this connected culture. It would be nice to dream of cutting all connections and going back to a simpler time when people actually told each other things and communicated face to face, but that ship has sailed and these days people expect you to know about the things they are sharing with you on social media. To not notice, or not care is a violation of the unexpressed social contract. As much as I have benefited from my season off the grid, I don’t think that I can, or should make it my regular practice.

What I can, and will, do in the future though is carve out intentional time to unplug and leave the world behind. I can’t remember a time in recent experience when I have been able to disengage from ministry as much as I was able to during these 40 days - especially when I took a 5 day mini holiday in the middle, the lack of social media enabled me to totally leave my work behind and be present with my family. I am planning to take a longer holiday later this summer and I want to take that disengagement one step further and leave my phone at home. There is something freeing and very human about being disconnected, and it’s a feeling that I want to experience again.

Beyond that I think my friends lists are due for some pruning. Apologies in advance if you get the axe - but I’d rather be more connected to fewer people that spread as thin as I have been. This is what I have learned over the past 40 days. Feel free to use the comments section below to share what you’ve learned from your lenten journey this year. I’d love to know!

*I popped online twice I believe during the fast to leave an important message. One to find someone to go and see Captain America with me and the other to lavish praise on my my wife. I stand by both posts. I never spent time reading anyone else's posts during these times.